By Larry Billinger
Defining Our Culinary Terms
First off, let’s get our definitions straight. The dictionary describes “soup” as a savory dish made by boiling ingredients such as meat, fish, or vegetables in stock or water. Sounds like a full meal in a bowl, right? On the other hand, “broth” is a flavorful liquid made by boiling ingredients. Considering this, when you enjoy your morning coffee, could it be that you’re sipping… a broth?
Arguments in Favor of Coffee as Soup
- Bean Talk: To begin with, many of our beloved soups highlight beans. Given that coffee comes from “beans” (technically seeds), it could indeed hint at a soupy nature.
- Brewing vs. Simmering: Next, we look at the process. Soups require simmering, while coffee demands brewing. Both, however, focus on extracting flavor.
- Warmth and Comfort: Additionally, whether it’s coffee or soup, both offer a comforting warmth on a cold day.
The Case Against Coffee as Soup
- Flavor Profiles: Firstly, soups are rich and savory, often standing as full meals. In contrast, coffee leans towards the bitter spectrum and needs additives to sweeten it up.
- Dish or Drink?: Furthermore, soups are hearty and filling. Coffee, though, is more of a breakfast sidekick.
- Sip Etiquette: Lastly, while slurping soup can be overlooked, doing the same with coffee? That’s slightly unconventional.
The Reddit Brew-haha: What the Internet Thinks
Interestingly, Reddit, our favorite platform for fiery debates, saw users tossing in their flavorful opinions:
- Some humorously dubbed coffee a “bean broth.”
- Another user quipped that iced coffee is essentially “cool beans.”
- Intriguingly, some users stirred up the tea vs. stock debate.
- Others pondered the thickness and starch content.
- And, unsurprisingly, the jovial declaration echoed: “Everything is soup.”
Larry’s Verdict
In this lively discussion, I’ve come to a verdict. Even though the idea of coffee as soup is amusing, I firmly place coffee in the beverage category. And just to note, I’m not particularly fond of hot drinks. The only lukewarm drink I might tip my hat to is chocolate milk — because who can say no to chocolate?
Over to the Audience
Now, it’s your turn. What’s your stance in this boiling debate? Do you envision coffee as a covert soup, or is it undeniably a standalone drink? Dive into the discourse and enjoy whatever fills your cup (or bowl)!
A Few Bonus Coffee Soup Dad Jokes
- Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged at the soup kitchen!
- Why did the soup see a therapist? It had too many brew-ed feelings, thanks to coffee!
- What did the coffee say to the soup? “You’re hot stuff, but I’m the one who’s brew-tiful!”
- Why did the coffee keep checking the soup’s temperature? Because it didn’t want things to boil over!
- What’s a coffee’s favorite type of story? A steamy soup opera!
- Why did the soup bring coffee to the party? To give the pot a stirring experience!
- What did the soup say to the coffee at the talent show? “I’m a big fan of your ground performance!”
- Why was the coffee acting sneaky around the soup? It was trying to espresso itself without being too obvious!
- How do you make a coffee soup giggle? Pour in a little brew-haha!
- Why was the coffee upset at the soup party? It felt too bean-there-done-that!
Image Credit: Generated with AI ∙ October 10, 2023 at 10:13 PM chunky coffee soup in soup bowl with crackers – Image Creator from Microsoft Bing
